Have You Ever Seen an Elephant Fly?
Have you ever seen an elephant fly? I haven't. I have seen a horse fly, I have seen a dragon fly and I have seen birds fly. But I have never seen an elephant fly.
Equally as odd as elephants flying are giant metal tubes filled with luggage and people flying- but they do! I flew in one yesterday back to my home in Orlando. (It is such a wonderful home.)
I love to fly. I love to be up high in the sky. I love the perspective I have when I am in an airplane. I love be able to see the clouds up close. Yesterday as I was looking out the window at the white billowing clouds I became so overwhelmed at the beauty of God's creation. The clouds were so massive and yet not intimidating at all. They were inviting and fluffy.
I sat there and wondered about how man and God combine. How they work together sometimes and how they work against each other. They both create things to form what we know as our world. I remembered watching beautiful sunsets which clearly and beautiful display the mighty artistry of God's hand. I remembered thinking it was odd when a jet flew by leaving a stream of smoke that caught some of the sun's brightly colored rays. I always thought it looked pretty- but a bit like it was intruding on something God was creating. It has always struck me as being a funny co-existence.
Those are just some silly thoughts that were 'flying' around in my head as I was flying.
Romans 1:20-21, "From the time the world was created, people have seen the earth and sky and all that God made. They can clearly see his invisible qualities- his eternal power and divine nature. So they have no excuse whatsoever for not knowing God. Yes, they knew God, but they wouldn't worship him as God or even give him thanks. And they began to think up foolish ideas of what God was like. The result was that their minds became dark and confused."
I know I have been called to be reading Romans for about a week now. It was not until this morning that I finally came around and obeyed that tug in my heart. I only read 4 chapters. I read them slowly and intently. I read them in 3 different translations trying to get all I could from them. I want to hear God's voice and I want to know what He is saying to me.
Even though I can not see God with my eyes I know He is real and very alive. This scripture in Romans reminds me that it is quite impossible and very inexcusable to ignore God. But I noticed another interesting thing in these verses. There is more than just knowing God and recognizing and acknowledging Him. I am supposed to worship Him and give Him thanks. More than that- there is no condition on that call. It is simple and to the point.
When I am not worshiping God and giving Him thanks for all things- for all circumstances; for what I have or don't have; for where I am at or not at; for who I am with or not with- it is so easy to get into a bad way of thinking or like this verse describes to think up foolish ideas of what God is like. I begin to doubt God and His sovereignty. I begin to believe that He is not more than enough for me, that He is not enough for me at all. I begin to think that His will and ways are not perfect.
I do end up feeling confused and in the dark. My focus is on myself and the God I am trying to make. I am trying to fit God in a box that I have designed. I am trying to make God do and be who I want Him to be instead of quietly trusting Him and submitting to His ways and authority- after all He is the creator of the universe- God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob- and He longs to be my God and your God too!
I love how in God's graciousness the second I come to Him and worship Him for who He is and give Him thanks instead of expecting more from Him He floods my heart with light. My whole mood and attitude shifts and lifts as soon as I turn my gaze to the everlasting God. These verses show me that there really is power in worshiping God and giving Him thanks; it shows me there is danger in not doing these things- in not being diligent about it. I do desire to love God unconditionally because the love He freely gives me is so undeserved and completely unconditional. He is worthy of my thanks and praise and He also knows how beneficial it is to me as well to worship Him as God and give Him thanks.
As I begin to worship Him. As I give Him thanks I only find more reasons to worship Him and more things to thank Him for! Once I am not focused on myself but instead on Him I realize the futility of my selfish ways and I see how utterly unfulfilling they are. Romans 1:25 says... "So they worshipped the things God made but not the creator himself, who is to be praised forever." I want to worship the creator and only Him. The work of His hands is so glorious but it points to God and reflects who He is.
I have so much to be thankful for. I have so many reasons to worship God. But likewise- I should not need a reason to worship or thank God. I should do this simply because He is God and He is holy and worthy. He is so gracious to give us anything at all- any reason to love Him. He is such a good God.
In the worlds eye I should be angry with God. I should be bitter and ungrateful. From that perspective I have lost nearly everything- my husband, my love, my security, my dignity, my home, my provider and the comfort all those things gave me. But how can I not rejoice when I realize God is so faithful to be supplying all my needs. He is supplying and providing for me in ways the world can not see or understand. I know I am not lacking any good thing! I know I have so many reasons to rejoice in the Lord always. The reasons to rejoice and to worship the Lord are not conditional and not based on circumstances. I give Him thanks simply because He knows me and I know Him and that is the most precious and treasured gift I could ever have!
We are called to put on the garments of praise. It is a decision and an act we must do.
Psalm 147:1 and Psalm 150:1-2; 6 "Hallelujah! It's a good thing to sing praise to our God; praise is beautiful, praise is fitting. Hallelujah! praise God in his holy house of worship, praise him under the open skies; praise him for his acts of power, praise him for his magnificent greatness. Let every living, breathing creature praise God! Hallelujah!
Tomorrow Eli has another appointment with his neurologist. Please be praying that it goes well and that Dr. Kojic has wisdom and discernment as she examines him. I want her to recognize anything that might be wrong but also I want her to know what things are not worth worrying about. I am excited to go see her with Eli tomorrow- I think she will be amazed at all he can do. I am hoping I will have good news to report back to you after his visit with her.
Saturday would have been AJ's 26th birthday. It chokes me up even to type those words right now. 26 is so young and I can't believe he is not here to celebrate his birthday with us. We will be celebrating his birthday- the day he was born and entered into this world is always one definitely worth celebrating. We will be celebrating the fact that he was able to have life. We will be celebrating his life on Saturday.
I know it will be a hard day. I am spending it with my husband AJ's mom, dad, brother (and his wife) and AJ's sister. We are also going to bury that other half of AJ's ashes. This will be a good thing for us to do- but I know it will be very hard. It will make AJ's death all the more final and absolute. We will hopefully be able to laugh a lot this weekend and have joy together. But I know we will also be missing AJ and missing that fact that he was alive and with us and laughing and joyful too.
I am glad we will all be able to be together this weekend. We will all be needing each other even more as we go through some of these significant events. I love AJ's family so much. I am so glad they are a part of who I am and that they will forever be my family no matter what else happens in my life. AJ's family is made up of some of the most amazing people I have ever known in my entire life. I respect all of them so much. It just breaks my heart to watch their hearts break. I wish there was something I could do. I wish there was a way I could take all their pain away and make it all better. I feel so helpless sometimes.
But I am very grateful to see how strong they are. They are doing a really good job and I am proud of them. I know we are all going to make it and be OK. I have hope because I know that God is providing for all of them just as He is providing me with the comfort and joy I need. I know we all serve the same God and He is equally good and faithful to all of us. I am thankful I can share these burdens with AJ's family. I am thankful we can all walk through this together.
In the same way I am thankful that I can entrust them to God and that I do not need to feel responsible for the state of their hearts. I am thankful that as I daily pray for them and give them to God that it is a work He does and not myself. I am thankful to be able to love them and pray for them and to try my best to meet them right where they are at. They have been so good at doing this for me. I want to be there for them in whatever way they need. I want to bless them and encourage them this weekend. I pray God uses me to love them and comfort them this weekend, even if it is just by me simply being with them.
posted by Kellie # 4:30 PM
