Thanksgiving
I am sitting here tonight very tired. Grief is exhausting. I am also trying to pack for our Thanksgiving vacation. I feel more like I am just walking around in circles, not accomplishing much. I have been trying to pack all afternoon and it is now 10:21p.m. and I am still not finished.
After all that has happened in these past few weeks my mind is turning to mush. The simplest tasks are now, well, not so simple. The other day as I was putting on my make up, I almost put the mascara on my eyebrows instead of my eyelashes where it belongs- ooops. But I will finish the packing soon I am sure, it's just taking a bit longer than usual.
For Thanksgiving AJ's family and Eli and myself are all going to Seabrook, SC. That is a small island off the coast of Charleston, SC. It is so beautiful there. It is a place AJ and I loved to visit. We are going to be there a whole week, starting tomorrow.
I am somewhat scared to go because I know it will be the first quiet time I will have since all this has happened. The business of "death" is a lot of work. Add on top of that all of Eli and I's doctor visits and there is just no time left in the day. I have been very distracted from the pain in my heart most of the time. But I know on vacation I will have a lot of time to reflect, and a lot of time to miss AJ.
But I also have to count my blessings this Thanksgiving. I have so much to be thankful for. In fact, I bet we all have many things to be thankful for if we take the time to reflect on it.
Take a deep slow breath.
There.
Is that something you are thankful for? I am thankful to be alive and to have air to breathe. I bet as you realize the miracle it is to even have breath you will be thankful as well. Think of how something so simple as air sustains us. It is amazing.
I am thankful for my beautiful son and for his health. His smiles make my heart happy. He is such a blessing and a source of comfort and joy. He also is starting to sleep through the night again- I am very thankful for that too. Sleep is a wonderful thing for all of us.
I will not be posting for a few days. Check back after thanksgiving though for some new photos. Since my good friend Shaun was so nice to hook up my computer and internet I can now upload our pictures again. After thanksgiving I will post a blog about how I celebrated my birthday too. It was pretty fun. Bitter sweet.
Blessings upon you as your read these words tonight. Love with all your heart.
posted by Kellie # 10:18 PM
